Tag: Faith
No longer held captive by…isolation
I lost a close friend this week.
My heart hurts as I battled with thoughts of “why didn’t I call her on Friday”, “why wasn’t I there to check on her when she needed me?”
Then in a quiet voice, God quickly reminded me that HE was there.
In an instant I began to celebrate all of our deep conversations about God and how much she loved him, our laughing at the silliest of things until we cried hysterically. The dinners, the kids parties, our funny dance moves, the cries on each other’s shoulders and the bear hugs that reminded each other that no matter what, everything was gonna be alright.
This loss, is devastating on so many levels especially for her sweet children, spouse, family and close friends.
But in the midst of these tears, more than ever I want to encourage you to reach out for help if you need it, your not alone and isolation is a breeding ground for lies, deception and defeat.
Reach out and tell someone…
anyone…that you need help.
I guarantee you, that you are not forgotten, and there is hope.💗
~ Denise xoxo
No longer held captive…by depression
They call her Joy.
she tries to hide in darkness…
but when you find her…
in the most inconspicuous places…
introduce yourself…
treasure her…
and never let her go.
xoxo Denise
The Joy of the Lord is my strength. -Nehemiah 8:10
No longer held captive…by rejection
You are my masterpiece
Created in my perfect image
There is none like you
I made sure of that
Uniquely crafted
Genuinely created for greatness
You are wanted
Never rejected
Loved beyond measure.
His love endures forever – Psalm 118:2
xoxo Denise
No longer held captive…by anxiety
Every broken heart
cries out to this earth for its healing…
You won’t find it
in your unending need
for approval…
those aren’t the places that I intended for you to seek truth…
look to me my daughter
there you will find your worth.
Hear my whisper?
Draw near to me…
like a firefly to its flame.
bring me your alabaster box..
and break its chains that surround you.
So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. ~ John 8:36
No longer held captive…secrets
being held captive
entangles truth
restricts freedom
and causes heartache
to follow you
uncover the darkness
shine light on every lie
of the enemy
that is keeping you bound
release yourself from its grip
and run free
So if the Son sets you free, you are free indeed. – John 8:36
Quiet the voice of deceit…
de·ceit \ the act of causing someone to accept as true or valid what is false or invalid
I think I am angry…
No, I know I am angry…
and I am really angry at you.
It happened over and over again, and you sat there and did nothing…
I know you didn’t want to betray me…
but you did…
I blamed you…..
I accused you….
and I despised you….
and most of all…
I hated you for not protecting me…
The innocence that was stripped from the loins of this little girl, brought years of heartache, shame and self hate.
This taunting voice of deception…
came in order to remind me of my past.
This direct battle between good and evil….
truth and lies…
hope and despair....
was an attempt to try to destroy me…
and keep me bound to pain.
Today, I bravely look at every jagged edge that was piercing the most sacred areas of my heart…
I boldly speak truth to those broken places…
I see worth…value…and the unending love,
that He so gracefully pours over me…covering me…protecting me.
Piece by piece, I am made whole.
~Denise
“Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” – John 8:32
Cutting the ties that bind….
My pulse is racing, sweat is pouring from my forehead, the lump in my throat is being crushed with each attempt to swallow. A panic attack is nearing…so I open my eyes, and realize I am ok.
Cut the rope from around your neck that’s attempting to choke your reality..
As a survivor of sexual abuse. There had been many years that an “invisible” rope was draped around my neck. Every flashback triggered a negative reaction that seemed to bring an overwhelming sensation of choking.
Literally choking..you know..the feeling of desperately trying to cry out or speak, but the tightening of the muscles around my neck, made it impossible.
The intense emotional pain from the abuse, had me wanting to crawl out of my skin in order to find relief.
“On the Other Side of Fear, Lies Freedom” ~ risingbean
For many years, the pain laid dormant around the exterior of my heart. Which prevented self worth and love to penetrate.
Every prior resistance to healing, is no longer confined to the barriers of those walls.
For over 40 years, I allowed the abuser(s) to have power over me…power over my way of thinking…power over the way I behaved….they controlled my destiny…because I gave them all my power.. Yes, many days, the pain still exists, but I am in a state of constant change that is taking me from despair…to reclaiming my life.
To live in freedom, is MY RITE OF PASSAGE.
I believe that on my Journey to Healing, God is the source of my Strength.
Shatter the glass of any negative in your past, Remove the burden carried upon your back.
Cut the rope from around your neck that’s attempting to choke your reality.
Stand with hope, truth and a desire to face all trials with dignity.
Breathe deep the fragrance of sweet victory. You have the power within to reach your every dream.
Stand up and know exactly whom you are, Lift your head my sister and no longer look down.
For a virtuous Woman is emerging from within.
Copyright ©2008 Denise Boyd
Owning My Story..
25 likes on facebook..changed everything…
25 LIKES…9 COMMENTS…556 FRIENDS…
On August 8, 2014..I posted a video on my personal facebook page to share with the “world” that I had been sexually abused as a child.
The moment after I clicked “post”, I felt on top of the world! I had conquered my BIGGEST Fear!
Or so..I thought.
As the days went by, the euphoria lessened and I realized that my post made others uncomfortable. The small number of likes and comments crushed me and made the ugly root of rejection, fear and depression come to the surface of my heart.
As much as I told myself that I was doing my part for humanity by bringing “Awareness”. I desperately wanted everyone to SEE that “I” was a victim of sexual abuse and rape.
I thought I didnt want to be looked at differently. But actually, yes, I DO.
I want YOU to read my post and feel uncomfortable. I want YOU to look at the video and cringe as you look into the eyes of me as a child and see the blank stare and pain of an innocent child who was sexually abused.
I was a victim of childhood sexual abuse and rape..
~ xoxo Denise
My Journey Home….to God & Self 